Should I Create an Altar Space?
Why Done is Better Than Perfect
Can you remember back to when you were younger and you had a space all your own? Maybe it was your bedroom and you decorated it with New Kids on the Block posters. Or, if you had to share a room, you built forts or had a tree house. Can you remember feeling like you could take a deep exhale in that space and feel at ease and comforted as if you were the only one in the world? This feeling is what I try to capture in my altar space. Peace, solitude, support, a big exhale. Because it is important to have a space all your own and as was a mom and a wife, I share ALL of my space with my family. Sometimes (or most of the time) the laundry flows over into my bedroom and a little boy sneaks into my bed a night. My safe space has turned into another version of the living room. It's not just mine, and it is far from relaxing.
WHY YOU NEED A SACRED SPACE OF YOUR OWN
1. The world is loud and you are busy. You need a space that allows for less distractions so you can relax.
2. Creating a space allows your family to realize that when you are in it, you are not to be disturbed. (Think about it like a grown up time out).
3. You can fill it with items that bring you joy instead of following a decorating scheme that matches the rest of the house.
4. It reminds you of who you are. When you see a beautiful space that you have made and filled with joy, you see your essence reflected back to you.
CREATING YOUR SACRED SPACE.
What is Self-Care?
Why Done is Better Than Perfect
1. It gives you room to grow
If you only produce when you are perfect, then you rob yourself of the gift of growing. Each time we complete something we have the opportunity to go back and get feedback. Sometimes feedback can come from a colleague, spouse, friend or yourself. You can take what you have discovered in the creative process and use those lessons for the next incantation.
2. It allows you trust in yourself
Tackling the "Should" Monster (How to Stop Letting "Should" Run Your Life)
When you were a child, most likely an adult or two was taking care of you. You didn't have to go to the store for food; someone was shopping and preparing or at the very least buying your food. Someone was reminding you to brush your teeth and take a shower. When you fell asleep in the car, someone put you to bed, and when it was time to get up someone woke you up and made sure you got to school. Aside from the basic care someone soothed and encouraged you- when you did well on a test they praised you and when you were sad they held you or bought you ice cream. In essence, as a child, someone other than you was in charge of your self-care.
As adults, of course, we take care of the responsibilities feeding and cleaning our bodies that our parents used to be handle, but that is not the same as self-care -that is just "adulting." If you are like most adults, "adulting" has taken the place of nurturing.
Nurturing and Self-Care are Synonymous
Do you have a list of shoulds for yourself? Ideas of how you are supposed to be, dress, and act?
I did. I will share my shoulds from a while back in all their glory- in no particular order of insanity.
+I should Be perfect. Perfect mother, wife, housekeeper, and lover.
+I should Be pretty. Wear makeup and dress to impress every single day.
+I should Be an amazing hostess. Have a theme party with gourmet food and a sparkling house.
+I should Say the ‘right’ things. If someone asks me any question at all, have a poised and articulate answer.